Guidelines to the game

create a safe space

honesty + vulnerability = “winning”

the fastest way to have fun is to slow down 

listen from a place of understanding 

it’s not as black and white as it seems

What are the two decks? 

“Dip your toes” is designed to break the ice a bit and ease into some of the more introspective prompts that follow. 

“Take the plunge” is designed to push comfort zones a bit and uncover some of the deeper experiences that form our preferences. 

What are common responses to the prompts?

• That’s a Dealbreaker
• That’s a Red Flag
• That’s me (or something I do) 
• That doesn’t bother me 

1 on 1 

Take turns drawing cards. The person who draws the card reads the prompt. The listener answers first, followed by the asker.

From there, feel free to ask each other questions. The initial responses are made to start the conversation, not end it. Just remember, it’s not as black and white as it seems and your initial responses don’t need to be set in stone. Say what feels right, and feel free to expound on or totally change your answer as you explore.

Once you’re comfortable, move from “dip your toes” to “take the plunge”. We’d suggest after 10 or so cards, but play as you’d like. 

3 - 5 players 

Whoever brought the game should start it off. Same rules above will apply, but with a slight twist. The person who draws the card will shift every round, moving to the left every time. The person to the left of the drawer will answer each prompt first. That means the person who responds first, will aslo shift each round. Once everyone has given an initial response and conversations have ended, the reader asks for final responses. 

Group Game | 6+ Players 

Same as above, although we noticed that in groups of 6 or more people lots of interesting stories and personal anecdotes tend to be shared. The conversation around each prompt is usually really rich and as a result, each prompt may take longer to get through. 

Once you hit 5 or 6 prompts from “dip your toes” feel free to move on to “take the plunge”. 

Reverse - 1 on 1 

Think you know someone? Want to make assumptions? It’s ok if they’re totally wrong. Take turns drawing cards from either deck (though we always recommend starting with “dip your toes” before moving to “take the plunge”). Whoever draws the card reads the prompt and the listener guesses how the reader would respond. In other words, the listener guesses where the reader draws the line on each prompt.  

The reader then tells the listener where they actually draw the line. If the reader’s response is different than guessed, both parties should feel free to explain or ask questions in order to gain a deeper understanding. 

Reverse - Group Game | 6+ Players

Same rules as in the Reverse - 1 on 1 game above, with a twist. Once the reader shares where they actually draw the line, those listeners who guessed correctly are awarded 1 point. Tally points on a physical piece of paper if one is available to you. Once everyone in the group has drawn a card 3x, the player with the most points should receive a good ‘ole fashioned round of applause for presumably knowing the most people, the best. It might be time to put a ring on that person’s finger, if you know what we mean. 

In Conclusion

Take the above as a light suggestion and know that there’s no right or wrong way to play the game, so if you find a format that works for you, let us know! 

We can’t say it enough. Through countless times playing with groups large and small, the key discovery we’ve made is that things that seem black and white on the surface are often a lot more gray than you’d imagine. Embrace the unknown and the uncomfortable. Embrace your truth.

We hope you have fun while learning about yourself and those around you.